July Newsletter- Christmas in July, What I'm Listening To, Hell Yeah Moment & More!
In this issue...
Christmas in July
What I'm listening to
Your moment of HELL YEAH
Most popular post
Christmas in July
“You stranded here, too?” the friendly voice asks amidst the hubbub. The Starbucks I’ve specifically chosen because of its normally chill atmosphere is absolutely slammed today. I’m unpacking my laptop at the last available table, next to the owner of the voice.
“I know, it’s really busy today,” I respond, realizing later that I misunderstood her. It doesn’t matter though. The woman plows on, and I get the feeling that she probably would have done so no matter what I said.
“Yep,” she replies cheerfully, moving her considerable setup a quarter of an inch to at least give the appearance of making room for me. “I’ll be here all day.” The woman motions to her laptop, separate keyboard, assorted notebooks, headset, and, oh good lord, portable printer. She sounds exasperated, but in a put-on kind of way. Her voice holds a barely-concealed glee at the prospect of getting to tell all her troubles to whoever sits next to her.
And today it looks like that person is me.
“Dropped my mom off at the doctor’s ‘bout an hour ago. She’ll be there ‘till 3 p.m., can you believe it?”
I try for a non committal “Mmmm…” to no avail.
“3. P.M. Whew… we drove in all the way from Hutto for this. Traffic wasn’t too bad- for Austin I mean, HA! Anyway lucky for me, I can work from anywhere!”
She again motions to her setup, proudly displaying a spreadsheet on her laptop.
Dread begins to sink in.
I have exactly 45 minutes before my kid’s dentist appointment. This is the only childfree window of work time I will have all day. I gifted myself this Starbucks outing to get a much-needed break from the noise and ongoing demands that come with having three kids at home all summer. And now this lady is…
“HAHAHAHAHA!! Will you look at that??”
…shoving her legal pad in my face.
“Couldn’t even read my own writing! It says ‘paid,’ Cheryl, not ‘laid.’ DUH!! HAR HAR HAR…”
It is official. I am in Hell, and Hell is run by a work-from-home (or Starbucks!) middle manager named Cheryl with bad handwriting and an arthritic mother.
She asks about the items I have laid out on my table, including the earbuds I attempt to insert in order to block out her nonstop monologue. She bangs out communications on her keyboard as if she’s furious with each individual key and wants to make it pay for what it’s done. She reads incoming texts aloud, providing colorful reactions to each one.
There’s no use in fighting it. This is my life now. It’s Cheryl’s world and I’m just a non-consensual participant in it.
But no! I don’t have to sacrifice my precious time to this woman’s constant interruptions and (of course) gum popping. I have agency! I can switch tables! Or leave! Boundaries! Yes that’s it, boundaries!! Now if I can just unplug my charger and…
“Oh, you have a charger! Lucky you. My dog chewed mine up and I just never bought a new one. See at home I have three monitors AND a docking station, so I just hook my laptop into that and it charges it. But of course today I’m working from here, so that doesn’t work. I gotta say, it’s MUCH easier working from home with my monitors. I can barely see anything on this teeny little screen. Could you just read this for me here?”
And I read it. God help me, I read it.
Because, in spite of it all, Cheryl seems like a good soul. A boundary-less, extremely chatty soul, but a good soul nonetheless. She has kind eyes and a delightful laugh. She has provided me with endless- and I do mean endless- entertainment. And, most importantly, if Cheryl was really a midsummer Santa doing undercover research for the holidays, I’m totally covered naughty/nice wise.
What I’m Listening To: Wiser Than Me
What do you get when you add 1 part comedy, 2 parts wisdom, and 1 part host who happens to be a national treasure? Answer: Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ incredible new podcast, “Wiser Than Me.” The premise of the show is simple: Julia talks with older women who share their hard-learned lessons, thus making her wiser by the end of each episode. And Julia being Julia, (can I call her Julia?), she gets some real bangers as guests. We’re talking Jane Fonda, Isabel Allende, Fran Lebowitz, and Diane von Furstenberg, just to name a few. The conversations are often witty, always insightful, and incredibly poignant. Kinda makes you wonder: why didn’t someone think of this before?
Your moment of “HELL YEAH!”
This tweet from freelance journalist Meg St-Esprit is making the rounds, and I just have to say “HELL YEAH.” If more women spoke up against the insane things we have learned to accept, just imagine what changes we could bring about.
My most popular post of the month
You know you’ve found your people when they like a good grammar joke. Not surprisingly, this thread quickly turned into the airing of grammatical grievances… because we know how to par-tay!
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